Hey, what’s going on?

“Absolutely nothing,” you say?

You’ve come to the right place. I’m practically sponsored by absolutely nothing.

I spend an inordinate amount of time on the internet for someone who actually has a day job. What I’ve found during my digital travels is that after a little while, you end up settling on a rotation of websites you actually enjoy. You bookmark them, you subscribe to them on your RSS feed, you add them to your twitter account, maybe you even “like” them on Facebook (why you would do this last one I will never understand, but whatever). This navigational efficiency cuts down the amount of time you spend on the internet and prevents you from wasting time, mindlessly scrolling through random sites looking to see if they’ve posted something new. You’ve now drastically cut down the amount of time you have to spend glued to your Macbook/iPad/iPhone. You have more time to focus on that other thing that you should be doing right now that you really don’t want to do but you know you should.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. That doesn’t sound like “absolutely nothing” to me. It sounds like you’re dangerously close to finding something more productive to do, which is why you came to see me in the first place. It sounds like you need a new ace for your starting rotation (although I’ll settle for middle reliever status), that can chew up innings and dependably get you to your closer. (That’s probably the last time I’ll awkwardly use a baseball metaphor. Probably.) This blog can do that for you. If you find yourself thinking, “man, where did that last hour go?”, you’re welcome.

While I’ve never been accused of being prolific (the blog’s name forbids it actually), check back here if you’re looking for a completely nonsensical assembly of writings that I will try and add to on the regular.

Comments are always welcome, unless you’re one of those people that posts “first!” If so, please don’t pretend that you read anything I wrote; we all know you can’t read.

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